Marat’s Booger.

One of Noam Chimpsky’s fondest memories was the time he was the body double for Bob Dylan in Pat Garrett & Billy the Kid.

There seems to be something off here. I can’t put my finger on it, though.

Crossed Signals In History- Unfortunately, due to the provincialism of Napoleon’s accent, people thought he was saying “Vive la France!”

While researching Noam Chimpsky’s counterculture phase, I couldn’t help but explore the emphasis on spontaneity, and a desire to dismantle control and conformity. I had to ask him about how candor, confession, and honesty about sexuality, made it into his poetry. All he said was, “I don’t want to talk about it. Pass me a banana.”

New videos purporting to show “other perspectives” shows that the entire incident at the Serengeti National Park has been wildly mischaracterized.

Shocking exposé photos of girls detoxing from Disney princess culture, by gonzo journalist Tonto Fielding, in new publication - Citizen Kane magazine.

Tonto Fielding is turning King John into a rap musical. Packed with rapid-fire lyrics, shooting out at you in a firework range of styles, King John is a thrilling, contemporary, immersive stage presentation that’s a union of story, text, music, image and movement that gets under the skin and into the blood. It speaks profoundly. The characters are thwarted by historical accident and adversity (the rightful heir to the throne), making King John a pragmatic representation of political events. And, as we process our appalling new reality, questions arise: What does this mean for the undocumented? What does this mean for women? What does this mean for people of color? What does this mean for the economy, for the children, for the planet?

In my famous interview with Syd Barrett, it was revealed that Andy Stewart sings Harry Lauder was the primary influence for The Piper at the Gates of Dawn.

My name has been put in for membership to the secret order of the Mystic Knights of the Ladle. Their motto is - “You cannot make a spoon that is better than a spoon.” I think it was my essay, “Chili is Not Soup,” that earned their attention.

OK, I’m changing my band’s name to Drunk Columbo.

Two males size each other up when a new car is introduced to the herd. Will they butt heads? As the old saying goes: “No matter how friendly a car may seem, it should never be trusted. Cars can be very aggressive and have been known to cause serious injuries, even death, to people.”

Today in Environmentalism — The Viverrafaciempiscis species are making their way into the Great Lakes. Experts are intimating the invasion as “rollicking mayhem, lampooning everything from zebra mussels, habitat degradation, fluctuating water levels, algal blooms, chronic wasting disease, lead-poisoned drinking water, endangered species and other problems, as they go.”

Collage, “Better Lay Off The Mescal” by Tonto Fielding.

I am a man of infinite patience. I even formed a chariot race for snails as a boy. That smart-ass cop who wrote me a ticket for jaywalking in a pedestrian crosswalk, fifteen years ago, will some day be getting a spoonful of salt in his coffee. He’ll never see it coming, I assure you.

Tonto Fielding and his writing partner, Persephone Lubitsch, are working on a song called “Lying Shit Weasel Shutdown Bitch Blues.”